Multiplayer rejoin prob Options

[kix]

Greetings to all and best wishes.

Since this IS the place for answers - I've gotten so-o-o many here before; I've another I'm seeking assistance for.

I usually create a party of 6 for [SOA-TOB] and then transfer the saved game to the Save folder and play away. But when I drop a character to pickup another [as in Valygar] I usually get a "character has nothing to say to you" when I try to get the character to rejoin. I usually save the character and re-import him to get around this - but there's got to be a better way!

What I've got is: Windows XP
SOA-TOB, Bioware TOB patch, G3 fixpack & Tweaks and a variety of mods [Anvil, DOQuestpack, Unfinished Business, Exnem's Vault, Abystore, Ribald's Genie, Planar Teleporter, Herbs, Improved Familiars, Improved Faerie Dragon and slightly Improved Illych] and starting out as 1st Level after adjusting stats, etc through Shadowkeeper.

In multiplayer mode join requests is "on", and I've tried various combinations of the other multiplayer options - with all the same "nothing to say to" me routine.

Particularly, is there anyway to adjust games already in progress so that I can drop them off and pick them up with no problem?

Thanks
kix [this is really kicking me]